FrewllKSwAbirdbythesea

“No”, the one small word would mean nothing to a stranger, but to me–it meant my whole heart. Even worse, the small but meaningful word came from his mouth–yes his. My one person I trusted with my soul and my mind had left me with the small powerful word that would separate us; forever and always.

—One Week Earlier—

“This is great, Greg!” we sat on the rooftop of his house and watched the birds get lost in the clouds.
“I’m glad you like it,” he smiled, “I always thought sand was better when it was seen and not stuck all over you.”
“That’s true.” I wasn’t so sure if something had been bothering him; he was particularly more generous today than any other day. “Something’s wrong…”
“I’m not sure if it’s wrong because I don’t know what your reaction will be—”
“—Whatever it is I can handle it, you know that.”
He looked at me, his big green eyes looking at me as if they were lost in the clouds.
“My parents signed me up for the military, and I just couldn’t say no, you know?” his eyes came back to life.
“You couldn’t say no? What am I supposed to do without you? I’ll probably end up dying because I forgot to breathe or something stupid like that.” I was shocked. Not because he was leaving me–that’s not what he was trying to do– but because he waited to tell me.
“It won’t be that bad, I’ll be back in a year.” I could see in his eyes that he didn’t have enough confidence to truthfully know he would come back. The confidence he needed to be able to stay alive in the war anyway.
I could only think of all of the other women with boyfriends and husbands, or all of the fathers and brothers that participated in the army. What about the women in the war also?
“What if you don’t?” my eyes shifted to the ground and my hair flowed around my face. He then lifted my chin up and looked at me with sincerity.
“I will,” he stood and took me to the stairs that led to the ground, “I promise.”

—One Week Later—

He had lied to me. He lied to me and told me that it would all be alright, and that I would never worry about a thing. The truth is; I’m worrying. I’m worrying like a mother that’s lost a child.
I’ve gone four hours without him. My heart twists beneath its barrier and I can feel it readying to explode; I kept asking why he would go to war, he knew I despised fighting and didn’t want anything to do with that war. I was pretty sure he didn’t just go because they told him to, he is eighteen years old, an adult.
That whole night I lay in my bed thinking about him, thinking about all that could happen to him. I would spend forever missing him and his green eyes and how wonderful his voice sounded when he spoke.